Sensing Destiny in Our Lives

For several months, I was unemployed and searching for work. It was a difficult time; a time that tested patience and faith. Then one month ago today, I was offered a job; a job that pays much less than I have grown used to; a job with no pension, little job security, a small dark office, little administrative support, and an antiquated computer. It is with a small, non-profit organization that does advocacy work on environmental issues.

I am now the Executive Director for this organization and will have responsibility for everything from running campaigns on environmental issues to purchasing paper. On this, my 2nd week on the job, I spent my Saturday buying a computer, two desks and a chair, and my Sunday moving them into my small dark office. There is a loud voice in my head that keeps saying: “You have won the booby prize; get out of here as fast as you can!!” But there is another voice that whispers: “You are exactly where you are meant to be!” While my rational mind screams: “I can’t believe that you worked 30 years to get here”, the deeper voice says: “Yes, your entire life has been preparing you for this!”

For now, I am allowing the internal debate to continue. But tomorrow, I will jump out of bed and rush into my small dark office with energy and focus because some part of me is thrilled by the possibilities this job presents. And while I wish the Universe provided clearer signs to let me know when I am on the right track, experience has taught me to trust my feelings.

About kp

I am a woman and a mother, a sister and a wife. I have called myself a socialist and a feminist, an environmentalist and an activist, a pagan and an atheist. But, at this stage in my life, none of these labels feel right. I am searching; trying to find an inner calm; trying to make peace with life's disappointments; trying to answer the big questions in my own small life.

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10 Responses to Sensing Destiny in Our Lives

Sally says:

August 3, 2015 at 5:28 PM

I am so glad that you have found work again. I know this has been a long, difficult time for you. May your inner knowing provide the guidance you’re seeking.

- kp says:
  
  August 5, 2015 at 9:42 PM
  
  Thanks for the good wishes Sally!!
  
Sue Dreamwalker says:

August 4, 2015 at 12:26 PM

Sometimes we just have to TRUST in our intuition and if deep down when you start your job and you feel the thrill of it,, then you will know… :-) Good Luck dear Kim.

- kp says:
  
  August 5, 2015 at 9:41 PM
  
  Thanks Sue….i am trying to trust that it will be an adventure either way!! Hugs to you. Kim
  
  - Sue Dreamwalker says:
    
    August 6, 2015 at 2:55 AM
    
    And if you look upon it as so, so it is.. :-)
    
Hariod Brawn says:

August 4, 2015 at 3:15 PM

Feelings and intuitions are reliable friends in times of uncertainty Kim are they not? Quite often, it seems to me, the body knows things that the rational mind has yet to discover.

- kp says:
  
  August 5, 2015 at 9:40 PM
  
  Yes Hariod,
  that has been my experience as well!! kim
  
Sue Dreamwalker says:

December 24, 2015 at 7:39 AM

Dropping by your garden Kim.. to wish you and yours a Happy Holiday Season.. Much love and Hope all is well with you Love Sue <3

Sue Dreamwalker says:

May 11, 2016 at 8:41 AM

Sending LOVE your way Kim… Sue xxx

Sue Dreamwalker says:

December 31, 2016 at 6:02 AM

Where ever you are Kim.. Happy New Year for 2017 xxx